We’re in the midst of the “return” season! We are going back to work, back to school, back to the rest of the year with all of its usual challenges of pushing for the last quarter results, planning the next year’s budget, finishing that online course, or finally getting around to that new year resolution before the year is over. In short - we are returning for the year-end growth spur, whatever growth means to you.
And now that you’re mulling over that question, what does “growth” truly mean in our society? And what are we trying to achieve through growth? As we aim for higher profits, increased productivity, stronger brands, and enhanced social presence we must question the true cost of this relentless pursuit of what some might call the “American dream.” Recent stories highlight a troubling reality: the human toll of unchecked growth and ambition.
The Dark Side of "Outperforming"
We live in a culture obsessed with "out-" verbs: out-work, out-compete, out-earn, out-spend. It's the corporate version of "Keeping Up with the Joneses." But instead of measuring success by who has the greener lawn, we measure it by who has the longest workday and the biggest bonus, and the fastest ascent up the corporate hierarchy. We've convinced ourselves that we need to "win" at all costs.
This obsession with outdoing others is deeply ingrained in modern society, particularly in the corporate world. A recent study found that people consistently overestimate the extent to which their peers engage in social comparison, leading to a "comparison trap" that fuels excessive competition. In the business realm, this manifests as longer working hours, always-on culture, competitive benefits (think in-office gyms, unlimited vacation policies) often masking underlying issues with work-life balance, emphasis on metrics leading employees to focus on "winning" these metrics rather than on the quality of their work, job-hopping to climb the corporate ladder quickly at the expense of developing deep expertise, and status symbols like the proverbial corner office.
But what exactly are we winning?
In a report by The Wall Street Journal, former and current employees at Bank of America revealed that despite policies intended to protect employees from overwork, junior bankers are still being pushed beyond reasonable limits. These rules were initially introduced after a London-based intern tragically died following multiple all-nighters. Fast forward to May 2024, when another associate died after working over 100 hours a week on a $2 billion acquisition. And while the bank asserts that they take violations seriously, the systemic pressure to over-deliver remains deeply ingrained—this culture of "out-work, out-compete, out-perform" has taken root in many industries.
The Modern Era of Hazing
This "work yourself to death" mentality creates a toxic cycle that rewards endurance over excellence. The expectation is clear from supervisors: I suffered, so you must suffer too. It’s a kind of corporate hazing, passed down through generations of workers. In investment banking, it’s not uncommon for employees to log over 80 hours per week on a regular basis—well above the healthy threshold. A similar story comes from Goldman Sachs in 2021 where junior investment bankers complained of “crushing workloads, 100-hour work weeks and demanding bosses”. Hazing isn’t just in financial services firms, it is found in manufacturing organizations, like Tesla (and X) that creates and perpetuates toxic work environments. Here’s the CBS story on the topic. Across industries, workers are being asked to do more, faster, and with fewer resources - at the expense of human wellbeing. American Institute of Stress found that 83% of US workers feel stressed out at work on a regular basis. A study reported by Business Insider shows another indicator of stress across all industries: Gen Z are taking more sick days. The study shows a 55% increase in sick days taken by Gen Z employees from 2019 to 2023. Pushing for “more” is not only harmful to individuals but also counterproductive for organizations. Jeffrey Pfeffer, the author of “Dying for a Paycheck” states that overwork and burnout cost an estimated $200 billion a year in healthcare spending in the U.S.
Who Really Benefits From This Grind?
But who actually benefits from all this overwork? Spoiler: it’s usually not the ones putting in the hours, nor even the customers that should benefit from higher levels of productivity! These are the executives, sales-people, the partners - the people who promise unreasonable success to clients and shareholders - often pocket the rewards. They leave the frontline workers to deliver on impossible expectations and their promises of sky-high returns while leaving employees with no choice but to keep up. On average, CEOs received more than 344 times the annual average salary of production and nonsupervisory workers in the key industry of their firm, reaping the benefits of extraordinary performance while frontline workers are left dealing with burnout, and falling behind economically, as their wages are not keeping up with the rate of inflation – in other words, they don’t have “real wage increases”. This disparity highlights the fundamental unfairness of a system that demands ever-increasing sacrifice from workers while concentrating the benefits at the top.
It is not just pay. The general incivility, hostilities, workplace bullying - all amplify the stress. A recent study by Deloitte found that 61% Gen Zs and 49% of millennials say they have experienced harassment or microaggressions at work. A survey by American Psychological Association found that 22% of workers said they experienced harassment at work in 2023 (compared with 14% in 2022) and 12% of laborers reported that someone within their organization displayed physical violence toward them.
In our rush to outpace one another, we're losing sight of fundamental human skills that are at the core of a healthy society. We're forgetting how to communicate authentically, resorting instead to sound bites, knee-jerk reactions, snarky comments on social posts, and violence. The art of conflict resolution is waning, replaced by a winner-takes-all mentality that leaves little room for compromise or understanding. Our ability to hold two conflicting thoughts simultaneously – a fundamental of critical thinking and empathy – is eroding in favor of black-and-white worldviews. Most alarmingly, we're losing our capacity to treat each other with basic respect and dignity. As we try to prove ourselves right or superior, we often dehumanize those who disagree with us. This erosion of civility and nuanced thinking that plays out in all sorts of arenas, including the political one in this election year, erodes our ability to solve complex problems, to build meaningful relationships, and to create a world where diverse perspectives can coexist and enrich our collective experience.
The Younger Generations Have A Lower Tolerance for Toxicity and People-Centric Companies Are Winning
As reported in a 2023 Gallup study, the younger generation has started calling out the BS, rejecting this "work yourself to death" narrative. Millennials and Gen Z have made it clear: they won’t sacrifice their mental health or personal lives for a paycheck. Younger workers prioritize work-life balance over any other factor when considering a job. They value mental health and meaningful work far more than a title or salary. This shift has sparked change within companies that now need to reconsider how they approach productivity, performance, and employee well-being.
Thankfully, these changes don't have to come at the expense of business performance. McKinsey’s analysis of “People+Profits winners” (companies that outperform on both financials and human capital development scores) are 4.3x more likely than the average company to maintain top tier financial performance, grew revenue at 2x faster than performance driven companies, generate roughly 30% higher revenue growth for every dollar invested in compensation, and are more consistent and resilient than their sector peers.
While these studies highlight the positive impacts of prioritizing employee well-being, some leaders still hesitate to address toxic workplace behaviors. Experts in the field emphasize that failing to tackle these issues can have severe consequences.
As Dr. Janet Walsh, the CEO of Birchtree Global and a Lecturer in the HCM program at Columbia shares “the challenge for most senior leaders is identifying and costing the financial impact on top and bottom line performance. The fallacy is removing a high performing individual who bullies will result in negative financial consequences. Our research shows that not addressing the problem results in significantly higher financial, operational, risk, and reputational damage.”
So what can be done to make the change away from workplace toxicity sustainable?
Redefining Success and the Role of HR
The opportunity to redefine success is now, and HR can lead the way and shift the narrative away from endless hours of work that lead to diminished results towards a more sustainable change:
Shaping Respectful Organizational Culture: HR can adapt workplace practices to influence a workplace culture that emphasizes empathy, work-life balance, and human respect over sheer productivity. The focus should be on results versus effort. With political and social tensions rising, this shift is critical to keeping the workforce engaged and healthy.
Better Workforce Planning: By accurately forecasting workload demands and aligning them with staffing levels, HR can ensure that teams are adequately resourced to handle expected volumes of work without overburdening employees. This involves hiring to fill immediate gaps, anticipating future needs based on business growth projections, seasonal fluctuations, and evolving project requirements. HR can work with the business leaders to analyze productivity data, employee feedback, and industry benchmarks to determine optimal staffing ratios.
Empowering Managers: Managers need to be more than taskmasters—they need to be coaches. It’s their job to recognize when workloads become overwhelming, push back when unreasonable demands are made, and serve as role models for setting boundaries. A longer-term perspective for sustainability of talent should be emphasized over the short-term focus of squeezing work out of people.
Redefining Metrics of Success: The days of measuring success purely by profits or hours worked should be behind us. Instead, employee well-being and job satisfaction should take center stage. The Business Roundtable Governance leaders recently met to reinforce the perspective that all stakeholders need to be considered when setting business objectives.
Digitize and Automate: AI and analytics are already becoming critical tools in redefining workflows and enhancing business outcomes. AI also offers the potential to automate repetitive tasks and offer insights into how work can be distributed more evenly, hence preventing overwork and burnout. Instead of asking people to simply work harder and faster, why not use technology to work smarter?
Fail Forward: Adopting practices that support this culture, such as "blameless" post-mortems after project failures, celebrating "fail forward" moments in team meetings, and incorporating lessons from failures into training and development programs will remove the stigma associated with failure and make employees feel empowered to experiment, share ideas, and push boundaries. Harvard Business School’s Amy Edmondson calls leaders to foster environments where employees are comfortable sharing mistakes and speaking up about difficult issues, as this drives creativity and growth. Forbes Magazine showcased Solange’s research that shows that high-performing teams drive higher levels of profitability.
Leveraging Boards and Ombuds: Corporate boards have a critical role in ensuring that leadership prioritizes ethical treatment and well-being. By introducing ombuds programs—where employees can anonymously report concerns—companies can keep their finger on the pulse of their workforce and act on issues before they become disasters.
Back to School. School of Human Civility.
The story of Bank of America’s junior bankers offers a stark reminder of the dangers of unchecked ambition. It’s time for us to enroll in what we like to call the “School of Human Civility,” where respect, empathy, and kindness come before work quotas and KPIs. Instead of hazing the next generation of workers because "we had it tough," let’s focus on creating workplaces where people are treated with dignity, respect, and care.
So what would “School of Human Civility” teach?
Emotional Intelligence: At its core, the curriculum needs to be built on emotional intelligence where we learn to navigate our own emotions, build a sense of empathy for others and discover that true strength lies not in suppressing feelings, but in understanding and channeling them effectively.
Effective Communication and Cultural Competence: Communication becomes an art form where top-down directives and passive-aggressive emails are replaced with non-violent communications, clear language, thoughtful approach to giving and receiving feedback, turning potentially contentious moments into opportunities for growth and understanding. Understanding and respecting cultural differences, adapting our communication styles accordingly.
Conflict Resolution: Conflict, once viewed as a threat, is reframed as a catalyst for positive change, we learn the subtle art of mediation and are equipped with the tools to de-escalate tensions and find common ground in seemingly irreconcilable differences. The goal isn't to avoid conflict, but to use its energy for constructive outcomes.
Inclusive Leadership: The curriculum must include addressing systemic issues. It tackles unconscious biases head-on, challenging us to recognize and mitigate our own prejudices. Leadership is reimagined as a service that builds psychologically safe environments where diversity is not just tolerated, but actively celebrated.
Work-Life Balance: Work-life balance isn't a perk—it's a necessity and we learn to set healthy boundaries, manage our time effectively, and prioritize our well-being. We come to understand that burnout isn't a badge of honor, but a sign of systemic failure.
Digital Civility: We live in a digital world where we are constantly exposed to ridicule, political gripes, clickbait and outright lies. We need to learn digital etiquette, maintain professionalism in virtual communications and navigate social media responsibly.
Ethical decision making: True civility extends to how we navigate complex moral landscapes in the workplace. Ethical behavior isn't just about following rules or avoiding scandal—it's about actively trying to do what's right, even when it's difficult, unpopular, or when we are forced to pick one of the two “wrong” choices. Many ethical dilemmas don't have clear-cut answers, but require careful consideration, consultation with others, and a willingness to revisit and adjust decisions as new information comes to light. We need to learn to have difficult conversations about ethical gray areas and learn to create systems that reward ethical behavior. We need to be comfortable with ambiguity and always err on the side of integrity, transparency, and accountability in business practices.
Perhaps most importantly, civility is not a destination, but an ongoing practice. Being civil doesn't mean being perfect, but rather being committed to treating others—and oneself—with dignity and respect.
Let’s go all “In-”!
We are at a turning point in how we define success and treat our employees. As HR professionals and business leaders, the responsibility lies with us to lead the way in creating sustainable workplaces where everyone can thrive—not just a select few.
It’s time to let go of the toxic "out-" culture and focus on what truly matters: the well-being of our people. By embracing new technologies and prioritizing human respect, we can build a future where work doesn’t have to come at the expense of our health, happiness, and lives. This is particularly timely as we approach another contentious election season. The tensions and divisions in our society make it more important than ever that we prioritize human connection and mutual respect.
We can choose a toxic route of confrontation and the “out-” culture, or choose a “joyful” agenda of “in-” - inclusion, innovation, inspiration, initiative, involvement, insightfulness, intentionality. It’s time to go all "In-"! to create a more human-centric culture of respect and civility. By prioritizing the well-being of employees and creating environments of empathy, trust, and psychological safety, we can break the cycle of toxic "out-" mentality.
Let’s go back to School of Civility. It’s September – school is “in-”!
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